Well, I lived through it. My first official month as an EM resident. 33 more to go. As I drove away from work this morning, I actually thought, "I'm gonna miss it (the ECMC E.D.), just a little." It's sort of like being back in medical school. You just start to get comfortable in a rotation, then it's time to shift again.
Last night wasn't too bad. I had a period of about 3 hours where I had one patient on the board, and they were basically sleeping in the E.D. waiting for a bed upstairs. I did get to do a trauma on my own. A 25 foot fall from a tree stand while hunting will knock the wind out of you. Not to mention breaking a couple of ribs, your arm, some important parts of your neck bones. Yep.
One major event that made me miss my trauma days was a double stabbing. You stab me, I stab you and we both end up in the E.D. There's a bit of excitement in running down the corridor with your hand covering someone's gushing wound and going right into the O.R. Last night I stood back and watched them rush by. I had a finger to sew back together. My patient would be leaving via the front door; not the morgue door like the trauma patient.
So this morning I sat for a second in the warmth of my car and watched the sun rise. Pondered my choices in life. Reflected on what might have been. But, to be honest, I am looking forward to what will be. Every day I pick up on something new to study, something I want to be better at doing, another skill I want to perfect.
And sometimes, yep just sometimes, I get a patient that says "Thank you" and really appreciates that I took the time to help them. And, that, more than anything makes me want to continue on where I am, what I am doing, this life I am living.